in memory
Track One in the series Disaster Preparedness
Growing up, I distinctly remember the overnight tsunami watches, where my family would gather our emergency stockpile of 14 days worth of food and water. every time, we’d meet at a safe place inland and wait for Hawaii News Now to give us an update. thankfully, we never had to pop open the raw spam, but we always kept our supplies waiting in the wings. My papa used to say we must hope for the best but prepare for the worst.
In many ways, I think disasters facilitate a very human experience, and they can result from more than just natural causes. We deal with disasters on a daily basis: we face loss, grief, love, heartbreak, pain, and the growth in between. Disasters carry the power to unite or divide us. they scare us. They break us. They force us to build back. But they remind us we’re alive. You know what I mean.
I want you to feel the sweat on your fingertips, the weight of your tongue in a deep conversation, the sand wiggled between your toes. Feel alive. To me, this series paints these sensations. These songs demonstrate the very human way in which I simultaneously hope for the best and prepare for the worst. In everything I do.
This is disaster preparedness.
The Meaning
Literal
The narrator tells the story of a first date that gave them roses and reveals why it never worked out. lol.
Personal
In many ways, a first date gives us a first impression of someone’s character, and, in this case, the date was genuinely a giver. It didn’t work out for two reasons: the narrator was trying to 1. save themself from the same heartbreak they’d just experienced (VERSE 1) and also to 2. protect the other person, this selfless giver of a person, from getting their heart broken by the narrator’s own carelessness because they still miss their previous lover (VERSE 2).
The Lyrics
VERSE 1
meeting you there instead of
letting you pick me up
cause i remember what
makes me fall in love
it was just the first date but
you were early and dressed up
the roses tugged at my gut
i smiled right through the hug
PRE-CHORUS 1
i’m sure you mean well
but i’ve been through hell
your bouquet has that smell
i won’t let myself
CHORUS
cause he walked away
when he promised he’d stay
i know you’re not the same
but i can guess what you’ll say,,,
and if i let myself love
but we fall out of touch
the flowers were too much
i’ll press them in memory of us
VERSE 2
maybe i’ve been using you
to forget and just
for attention cause honestly
you’re taller than him
and you’re one to listen
you care and ask questions
but i still miss his scent
when you and i are talking
PRE-CHORUS 2
don’t get your hopes up
walls down but i’m tough
i fell into a love
that i fell right out of
CHORUS
BRIDGE
and i’d like to hope this ends
with calling me your friend
a flowered chapter of text
to remind me of when
CHORUS